The Hits Just Keep On Coming

You know what TOTALLY ROCKS?

When the people who are buying your house are coming for their inspection at the exact same time that the inner-workings of your septic tank are exposed for all the world to see!

Or smell, as it were!

I’m trying not to panic.

But the not panicking is harder than you might think.

You see, our repairman was supposed to be here at 8:30 yesterday morning, but he didn’t get here until 4:30 in the afternoon. And then he said that he didn’t have enough daylight to do anything but dig the hole.

Which made perfect sense to me SEEING AS HOW HE WAS EIGHT HOURS LATE.

And then this morning the heavens opened up and poured down the rain and as a result, no work was done.

So when D called the repairman this afternoon to see if he’d be here tomorrow morning, Septic Man (who is actually very kind) asked if there was any water in the hole that he dug yesterday.

D calmly replied that why, yes, strangely enough, there was a good bit of water in the massive pit.

Septic Man said, “Hmmmmm. That’s not good.”

LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LET’S SING THE DENIAL SONG LA LA LA LA LA LA

Because here’s a funny story. And a true story, too: I’m not nearly as worried about the rainwater in that hole as I am by ALL THE OTHER DELIGHTS that are creating such a pleasing array of olfactory sensations when I step into our backyard.

Anyway. Our realtor has assured us that the buyers are really laid-back and very relieved that we’re taking care of the repairs.

But we’ll see what the inspector thinks.

By the way, just typing that last sentence made me sick at my stomach.

Maybe I should let the buyers know that I have a blog with the initals “BM,” and really the whole septic tank thing is just part of a themed home-buying experience.

OH lordy.

Pray for me.

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Comments

  1. Sounds like he’s not the #1 guy in the #2 business after all.

  2. Do you think the inspector might buy it if you told him you were putting in a pool, just because you’re feeling generous, for the new homeowners? I didn’t think so. And then there’s the stench.

    Good luck with that inspection! I’ll be praying for you.

  3. I absolutely LOVE your blog! You can take the most mundane happening and turn it into a wonderful story! I have gotten to where I look so forward to seeing what in the world you’re writing about today!

  4. Oh my. That really stinks. =)

    I’ll be praying for you–that part is serious in case you’re wondering.

  5. Oh, BooMama, I am so sorry that all this is happening at once. I will pray for you, BM…

    But I also have to say that you have the most delightful way of turning what some might think of as a household tragedy into one of the funniest things I’ve read in a long time. I mean, I’m sure you’re not laughing, but I must admit that I giggled – more than once, even – as I read this post.

  6. I am laughing too, I mean with you not at you!

    I am also making your Uncle Ben’s Rice and Shrimp casserole that was the first blog thing I read!

  7. I will pray for you. I will pray that you get your sh*t together, so to speak so you can sell that house. Amen.

  8. Oh my.
    I do hope the inspection goes well. I’m sorry all this is happening at one time.

  9. Who knew the whole BM thing would come back to bite you in the, um, back yard.

    Praying for you!

  10. I laughed my way through this whole post, because honestly, only you could make septic issues funny.

    And then, I read Antique Mommy’s comment and I might have wet my pants, just a little.

  11. Doesn’t life just stink sometimes? Okay – I’m sorry. That was really lame (couldn’t resist). I’m sure the buyers will understand. They are probably down on their kneees in gratitude that it didn’t happen a month from now. All will be well.

  12. When it rains….Oh, nevermind. ;-)

    Seeing as how you’re getting the repairs done AND FOOTING THE BILL, I don’t see how the potential new owners can gripe too much. You’re the one who has to live with Lake Lottahockey in the backyard and the odiferous cloud hanging over you till it’s fixed. It’ll all be fixed and smelling like roses again by the time they move in. Surely they can be grateful for your sacrifice. Surely…. ;-)

  13. BM *snort* you KILL me with your humor

  14. A themed-home buying experience. LOL!

  15. Just laughing and laughing and laughing. . .I cannot wait to hear your moving experiences. Way funny, you are.

  16. Okay I’m glad you just made me laugh with your post, because I went into my twins room (20 months) to find the youngest with his diaper off… :-) you can only imagine the mess :-)
    Thanks

  17. Oh BM… this really reeks for you. Don’t worry, this crappy situation will be purged from your memory and the bowels of your septic tank will be covered up with lots of dirt and time.

    Don’t look so flushed. This too shall pass.

    (praying for you and your septic tank both)

  18. That’s it! Between Big Mama’s rat and possum story this morning and you connecting the BM initials to this disaster, I’ve had it. It’s just not right to laugh this hard this early in the morning.

    Boy, when it rains, it pours, right?

    You poor thing. I’m impressed you’re hanging on to your slightly sick sense of humor, Boo.

  19. Holy Canolli! Praying for you! T-Lo

  20. Praying for you. Just tell little one,,,NO SWIMMING :))

  21. Wow, definitely will be praying for you.

    Leave it to you BM to make a septic backup funny. Got to laugh to keep from crying I suppose.

  22. We just went through septic tank issues. SO – NOT – FUN! Praying for you.

  23. Prayers!

  24. I share your pain, I have had it with service people and their attitudes, coming when they feel like it with no excuse or apologies whatsoever and presenting the customer with a big invoice. Hope your repair goes well.

  25. Oh I’m saying a prayer and trying not to laugh. It really isn’t funny. I’m sorry you are going through this. From one septic owner to another all I can say is I hope your day starts to smell sweeter and try not to give a crap….:D Sorry had to say it.

  26. oh my goodness…
    I am sure it will all work out ok
    prayers your way :)

  27. Oh boy, I feel for you. We sold our house in March, and I was a nervous wreck until it was over.

    I’m doing your recipe swap/dinner party tomorrow night!

  28. This post was slap my thigh and laugh out loud funny. You poor thing! I know your day must be stressful, but thanks for putting a smile on my face. God bless!

    ps…I am so addicted to your blog. You are hilarious!

  29. Yikes! How stressful. I hope it all works out for the best.