All righty, internets.
Since I have absolutely NOTHING to write about except for the fact that my husband is suffering from a man cold (hello, congested husband-of-mine! Happy Birthday! Alex and I are going to wrap up some decongestants for you right after we finishing making you a cake from cough drops!), I thought I’d elaborate on a topic Big Mama and I discussed in our last podcast and share a little of my search engine term joy with you.
And for those of you who have asked how I can tell what terms people are using to find my blog, it’s all because of the handy little WordPress blog stats plug-in. It tracks all the terms and keeps them in a lovely little list that’s organized by date. The actual search engine isn’t specified – so there’s no way to know if the search came from Google or Yahoo or MSN or wherever – but when you’re dealing with this kind of humor, who cares?
After all, this is some serious interweb treasure.
boomama, all.the. talking
boomama, the talking, talking
boomama, always talking
I think I should probably be offended.
I mean, I know brevity is not my gift, but still.
After all, I am quiet for SEVERAL WHOLE MINUTES a day.
is it okay to use cream cheese from may
I’m going to go out on a limb and say no. Because that would mean your cream cheese is about eight months old.
And really, when you’re dealing with processed dairy items, you can never be too careful.
I are test you for internets. (OH NOSE)
Come again? (OH EYES)
don’t y’all love paula
You know, I do love her. To pieces. I just love her to pieces.
bangs scrunchies tight-roll jeans
No.
Just say no.
listen to Cici Winans
OKAY!
a picture of santa under a tree
Unfortunately, I don’t have a picture of Santa under a tree.
However, I do have this.
You’re welcome.
Can Ash Wednesday be shifted?
You know, I think you’ll probably have to take up that particular question with God.
I’m sure He’ll be absolutely delighted to hear from you.
how long is bacon fat good for?
I have no idea, but judging from this question, I think you and I may be related.
I have medium blonde hair. I colored it
ME, TOO!
You’re going to be right at home here.
sneakers you going to feel pain
I’m certain that sneakers across the world just cowered in fear.
And they probably made a phone call to their tough and rugged boot friends.
Consider yourself warned, trash talker.
Consider yourself warned.
rap for my friend Brianna
Well.
Um.
Okay.
If you insist.
This rap is for Brianna, and I’m here to say
That rap is not my thang on the best of days.
Plus Brianna is a stranger and I think you know
That it’s hard to kick it freestyle so I guess I’ll go
And eat some more fried chicken, drink a diet Coke.
‘Cause you know I love some food and that ain’t no joke.
Yo, Brianna. Yo yo, Brianna.
Yo, Brianna. Yo yo, Brianna.
Never change.
Word.
January 23rd, 2008 at 11:54 am
Hysterical! Thanks for the laugh, especially the rap. That was priceless.
Leslie
January 23rd, 2008 at 11:54 am
Man, it’s everybody’s birthday in January! HB2U, BooMama’s husband!
January 23rd, 2008 at 11:54 am
Okay, so I just thought you should know about this very important event. Dh and I stopped to eat at Popeyes the other night, and I thought of you. It was the same day you posted about the thingy at church with the trays upon trays of chicken tenders. It was like we shared a mutual fried-chicken-bond that bridged the geographical distance between us. I just felt you should know about such a tender moment. (Oh yes, I am that punny.)
~Bev~
January 23rd, 2008 at 11:57 am
Oh, and I love me some BooMama freestyle rappin’.
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:00 pm
Word to your muthah!
Here are the most recent search terms for us:
bible story farmers preparing for rain
lemon teeth drunk
poopy diaper changing daycare
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:04 pm
You are hysterical!! Love the rap.
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:05 pm
HAHAHA — loved the rap. Wish I could throw down like that, but I can’t. It’s against my religion. Well, not really, but it should be.
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:07 pm
Oh . . . oh. my!! This is one of the many reasons I keep comin’ back for more and more of “the talking”! How I love your sweet, now rappin’ self, Sophie.
Now, I’ll go put my hat on backwards, bust a move with the Ab Ripper and eat a BLT, heavy on the B.
Right after I wipe the tears of laughter from my eyes, not “NOSE”.
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:07 pm
I love it when I can laugh out loud. thx
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:07 pm
Does the talent never end? I just had no idea…you’re a true Renaissance Woman.
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:15 pm
Oh.my.goodness. I almost woke my 3-yr-old up from her nap laughing at the rap!
The Fresh Prince of Bel Aire
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:15 pm
Oh my good Lord in heaven. You kill me!
No, literally, you almost killed me – I half inhaled a piece of chicken while reading the rap. ;)
Thanks for the laughs!
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:17 pm
You’re funny! Thanks for the rap. I’ve had a stressful couple of days and I really needed a laugh. In fact, I am still laughing. Thanks!
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:18 pm
Such a gift for Brianna.
Word, yo.
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:24 pm
On the floor, I am on the floor. You are soooo crazy!
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:25 pm
This was the funniest blog post EVER!!!! I have tears running down my face!!!! Yo, Brianna. Yo, yo, Brianna. Word.
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:32 pm
You. Are. Priceless.
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:33 pm
The rap was great! You made me laugh today!
Happy Birthday to your hubby!
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:33 pm
This post forced me to delurk. That was the funniest thing I have read in a long time.
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:33 pm
Oh my…I laughed so hard. I LOVE the rap!
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:38 pm
Was having a bummer of a day until I stopped by here. I’ve had a good belly laugh and I’m all set now, thanks!
Wonderful stuff.
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:40 pm
It takes a lot to make me laugh, but you do it daily. Thanks for making me smile!
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:42 pm
Oh my word! That is hilarious!
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:44 pm
You’re a mess, a talented mess, but nonetheless a mess!! Thanks for the laugh!!
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:46 pm
I’m laughing so hard!
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:00 pm
Yo yo, dog.
That rhyme was off the HOOK!
You’ve got mad skillz.
Word to your (Boo)Mama.
Fo Shizzle!!
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:02 pm
BOODADDY AND I HAVE THE SAME BIRTHDAY!!!! It would make my day if you commented on my baby blog. Happy Birthday Boodaddy!
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:07 pm
Awesome. And funny. Lately, the majority of searches for my site have included “popping zits.”
Perfect.
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:07 pm
Tater and Tot- “Fo Shizzle”…. I love it!!!!
Stinkin’ hi-larry-ious… the whole dang thing. Thanks for the laugh!!
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:08 pm
laffin’ LARGE!
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:08 pm
Hysterical!! Love the rap. I always get a kick out of the searches too.
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:10 pm
Oh, have mercy! I loved your rap! Thanks for making me laugh out loud today. Oh, and Happy Birthday Boodaddy!!
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:11 pm
Oh my stars. You’re one funny mamma!
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:12 pm
Girl. Your nothing beats my something anyday…
And I do believe that DYM now has a contenda for her rappin’. I smell a blogging smackdown…
And Happy “Foggy-Headed” Birthday to David. May he get all the clear passages he can stand for his birthday.
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:19 pm
Oh my, did that had me laughing!
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:26 pm
Bacon fat, cream cheese, rap,all the talking, sneakers…Quite eclectic
I usually get is variations on:
Mary Osmond hairstyle
Marie Osmond bangs
Marie Osmnd hair cut
And sadly, a couple “dungeon girls” searches.
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:27 pm
Bacon fat, cream cheese, rap,all the talking, sneakers…Quite eclectic
I usually get variations on:
Mary Osmond hairstyle
Marie Osmond bangs
Marie Osmnd hair cut
And sadly, a couple “dungeon girls” searches.
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:28 pm
I could post my comment a third time but that might seem repetitive.
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:32 pm
Okay, the rap had me in tears … from laughter! You are crazy!!
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:51 pm
I so rarely truly LOL when reading funny stuff, but girl you were making me LOL like I hardly ever LOL.
Funny, funny stuff.
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:56 pm
Nice rap! I think you may have found a new career path!
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:03 pm
These other bloggers going to Uganda…..um they just DON”T KNOW what they are up against. Their lives will truly be changed having spent time with you! You are a hoot, girl.
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:11 pm
Holy canoli, made me spit my diet coke!!! And I am not sure that peein’ my pants in front of my potty training child woulda been such a good idea but I laughed so hard I almost did!!!! Woo, thanks Mama, I needed that!
I was actually found through a search for how to cure pampered chef stones … but my blog was about curing cradle cap (with a pampered chef rubber scraper – not my proudest moment but it worked!!!
Go, Boo, Go Go Boo Mama
WORD!
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:16 pm
Oh you wild throwin’ down mama you! The rap is worthy indeed (don’t use the word worthy about a white woman rap and our savior in the same paragraph though because that might be blasphemy). Love it and I am certain Brianna is tickled to the cockles of her lil heart. About the frightened sneakers – I think it must have reached my sneakers ’cause I’m about to climb under a chair to retrieve the one who managed to run away. Evil lurking everywhere nowadays. Go Sophie, Go Sophie – woo hoo woo whoo – and yeah.
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:22 pm
Oh, that was truly a work of art!
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:27 pm
I sucked in a whole wedge of lemon, and it wasn’t one of those small ones neither, when I read your “rap, yo.” I about died!!!
My eyes are still watering and I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to have lemon in my water ever again, because as I just said, I. ABOUT. DIED.
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:33 pm
I am just left with one question: WHY would people search for ‘sneakers you are going to feel pain’? Why?
Hilarious, as usual, by the way.
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:42 pm
I just almost snorfed coffee out of my nose, Sophie! Your funniest post today so far. ;o)
xoxo
Diane
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:44 pm
PS: Happy Vick’s Salve and Hall’s cough drops Day to D. Hope he feels better soon.
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:45 pm
You are just too funny! The only thing better than reading BooMama’s rap would be hearing it!!!