In which I interview my little man, age five, because I love this age so much that I can’t decide if I’d rather dip it in vat of chocolate or deep fry it in a vat of peanut oil, though now that I think of it either option would be equally delicious:
What do you want to be when you grow up?
“I want to be a daddy.”
No, I mean, what kind of job do you want to have?
“I JUST WANT TO BE A DADDY.”
Okay. Well. Where do you want to go to college?
“Um, I think I will go to Mississippi State for college.”
Where will you live after college?
“Um, I would like to live in the house with you and Daddy after I get married. I will still call you ‘Mama’ and ‘Daddy,’ but the girl I marry will call you ‘David’ and ‘Sophie.’ I don’t know how to pay for things, but that’ll be okay because she will know how to pay for things.”
[alarmed] You want to get married right after college?
“Oooh, yes, because I want to grow up. I’m growing up like a flower. ‘Cause flowers grow.”
What’s your favorite place in the whole wide world?
“Um, good question, Mama. I say our house.”
“Well, CiCi’s Pizza. But I love our house because it has Wii stuff.”
What’s your favorite thing to do with your daddy?
“Play Lego Star Wars on the Wii.”
What about with me?
“When we make presents for Daddy and go to the grocery store.”
What are your favorite books?
“The Go Go Dogs, Chicken Little, Max’s Chocolate Chicken, Rolie Polie Olie’s Big Time Olie.”
What are your favorite toys?
“Buzz Lightyear car, Batman sword / light saber and my spinny light saber. And my Star Wars people.”
What’s your favorite thing to do outside?
“Ride my bike. And goin’ down the hills.”
What’s your favorite song?
“‘You can go / I’m gonna stay’ by Dave Barnes. ‘We can change the world’ by Dave Barnes. ‘He’s Alive’ by Travis.”
[Note: those would be “A Lot Like Me,” “Brothers & Sisters,” and “Alive Forever, Amen” – he’s not so big on the titles.]
What are your favorite movies?
“Say this: Star Wars. Curious George.”
What is your favorite game?
“Sorry and Mouse Trap. ‘Cause that thing? On the crane? That’s my favorite part. That big bad guy goes up and traps somebody.”
Do you know why we help Sharon in Africa?
“‘Cause we have to, Mama. Because people don’t have much money, and we can help to take care of them. Jesus wants us to help take care of people.”
What do you know about God?
“That He always takes care of everybody. He helps people to feel better. He loves us. He made us. He made the whole wide world. He made the earth. And Jesus is in my heart.”
What do you think about kindergarten so far?
“I like going to P.E. I like going to music. I like going to the playground. My favorite part of the playground is sliding and swinging. I like playing and painting. I love my teacher.”
Anything else you want to say?
“I’ll say something after we play football, Mama.”
Well. Fair enough, then.