Contrary to what you might think – and though my regional enthusiasm might indicate otherwise – I really don’t walk around with a head-in-the-clouds, idealized notion of the South. I totally get that this part of the country, like any other part of the country, has its issues.
But still. It’s tough for me to be objective about this place. Mainly because I love it so much.
I love the people. I love the towns. I love the hospitality. I love the sense of family. Lord knows I love the food. And I love the way Southerners treasure the pieces and parts of our lives that make us different, that set us apart.
For the last forty years Southern Living has captured all the best parts of Southern life. The unique places, the colorful people, the inviting homes, the phenomenal food – you could find examples of all those things inside every single issue. And no matter where I’ve lived as an adult – Mississippi, Louisiana, Alabama – Southern Living has followed me from mailbox to mailbox, from living room to living room, from coffee table to coffee table. In so many ways, that over-sized, stapled, heavy-on-serifs magazine has been like an old friend.
A few days ago I had a great email conversation with a wonderful lady who works for Southern Living. She could not have been more understanding about last week’s post and the comments that followed. Her emails really helped me to understand that the recent changes at Southern Living are intended to be a leap forward, and she said that they feel like they have exciting things ahead. She was so nice, in fact, that I thought about renewing my subscription just to support her. I know she and her colleagues work oh-so-hard at what they do, and I’ve felt a little guilty that what I wrote may have been discouraging to them. I apologize if it was.
And the more I’ve thought about it, the more I’ve realized that at the heart of my original post is a concern about something way bigger than a magazine.
Talk to any life-long Southerner, and he or she can tell you a hundred different ways that the South is increasingly homogenized. Beloved mom and pop establishments have been replaced by chain restaurants, chain bookstores, chain gas stations and chain department stores. People stare blankly when they hear the names Eudora Welty, Willie Morris or Tennessee Williams. Teenagers in Southern suburbs sound like they could have grown up anywhere. Atlanta has an IKEA, for crying out loud.
But like The Biltmore in Asheville, Toomer’s Drugs in Auburn, Commander’s Palace in New Orleans, and so many other regional touchstones, Southern Living has, for countless Southerners, been a sweet reminder of the traditions that make our South so unique. And while you may think it’s overly sentimental for me to bemoan Southern Living’s recent changes in binding, size, and style, it’s really not so much sentimentality as it is sort of a weary resignation to the fact that the South is also changing in ways I don’t necessarily love.
Quite frankly, I’ve just been sort of bummed that Southern Living wasn’t an exception to the rule.
For me, Southern Living used to be an invitation to slow down and take in the wonder of the South. The look was completely different from every other magazine, and somehow that was Just Right – because this place, this South, is unlike any other place. At least for now.
So you can tell me that the new binding is modern. You can tell me that the new size is appealing. You can tell me that the new layout is functional. All those things may very well be true.
But here’s the bottom line with me: I don’t want “new and improved” from a Southern benchmark like Southern Living any more than I want to have a long, in-depth conversation with Emma Kate via text message, any more than I want to make a pound cake from a mix, or any more than I want to haul out some paper plates and plastic cups for Christmas dinner.
I mean, if I wanted to, I could probably figure out a way to fry chicken in a microwave for the sake of convenience.
But that doesn’t necessarily mean that I should.
I’m sure that if you give me enough time, I’ll get used to the new look and feel of Southern Living. I’ll probably grow to love it, even. After all, I’ve gotten used to the fact that some brides now register at Target instead of their local china shop, and I’ve gotten used to the fact that wearing white year-round has become acceptable. I’ve gotten used to the fact that it’s perfectly fine to don linen straight through fall.
So yes, times change. Traditions fade.
But the old Southern Living? It was perfection, y’all.
I’ll vow and declare it for the rest of my earthly days.
And that’s all I have to say about that.
September 15th, 2008 at 3:37 pm
well now, what could any of us add to that?
you represent us well, boomama.
from one southern lady to another. :0)
September 15th, 2008 at 3:43 pm
I’m doing a hurkey in the air for BooMama’s unapologetic stand. Time may change many, many trends and things, but what’s born deep in the heart only grows in the fondness of simple, southern traditional delight.
September 15th, 2008 at 3:44 pm
Wow.
One of your best posts.
Evah.
Makes me want to stand and cheer and wave my grandmother’s handkerchiefs. Yes, M’am.
September 15th, 2008 at 3:49 pm
Lovely thoughts. And so true!! Every time another Southern benchmark goes away (the most painful lately was the sellout of Parisian to a store that’s name sounds like a belch – which is not AT ALL Southern), It hurts me terribly. I am with you!
September 15th, 2008 at 3:55 pm
Well said.
Very well said.
September 15th, 2008 at 3:56 pm
I hear ya! Just yesterday I paused as I dressed my 2 yr old for church. I had reached for her white shoes. Wait! I thought. We’re beyond Labor Day. Should I? In the end I did, but only because I haven’t bought her a “church dress” yet to go with the black shoes she has. Some traditions are hard to let go!
September 15th, 2008 at 3:58 pm
This could ring true in many parts of the country. Festivals that I grew up loving in my hometown in Michigan don’t have the same panache’ as they do for the younger generations. This is truly a commentary on where society is going.
I try and shop (what I can afford) as many locally owned businesses that I can.
Thanks for your eloquent post :)
September 15th, 2008 at 3:58 pm
This post makes me want to cry. You know, when I read it, I think I could hear the faint refrains of Dixie somewhere in the background.
I love the South!
September 15th, 2008 at 4:07 pm
I swear on my great-grandmother’s Chantilly silver, that was one of your finest.
As a fellow preservationist of the south, I’m right there with you.
September 15th, 2008 at 4:12 pm
Well, and besides which, it is just plain ugly and hard to read!
As I told them in my letter, if I wanted to read a magazine in which the advertisements for toilet bowl cleansers take my eye more than the articles, I’d have renewed my subscription to Country Living.
September 15th, 2008 at 4:23 pm
Best post ever. Bravo, BooMama. Well said.
September 15th, 2008 at 4:25 pm
Well said. Yes, I like for some things, like SL, to stay the same for goodness sake! As I said before, I couldn’t place my finger on why I have not read the past 5 magazines I have gotten and you nailed it down. Some appeal was lost, I agree in their moving forward to stay “current.”
September 15th, 2008 at 4:26 pm
It’s been a while since I’ve seen a SL, but I remember the general flair. I’ll have to track a copy down–not sure they even sell such a thing in the Pacific Northwest–where magazines are covered with reusable flannel and contain pages made with biodegradable corn.
(Oh, we love our regions.)
September 15th, 2008 at 4:29 pm
This post has perfection written all over it. Thank you so much.
For years, my dear Granny gave me Southern Living every year for Christmas. The first Christmas after she passed away when I received the renewal notice in the mail, it was a tough day. I’ll still continue to read it though, because I miss my Granny and because the Air Force sometimes makes us live in places other than the South. Can you even believe that??!!
September 15th, 2008 at 4:44 pm
This Southern girl could stand up and applaud you right now!! What a fine piece of writing that was :). And white shoes after Labor Day? No matter how hot it may be here in NC, my little girl and I just will not do it! Generations of Southern women in my family would come haunt me if we did :).
September 15th, 2008 at 4:54 pm
Bless your heart…
September 15th, 2008 at 5:00 pm
Very well spoken and I couldn’t agree more. I just feel some things shouldn’t change. I guess that is all I am going to say.
Well, except to say, I hope you are feeling better!!
September 15th, 2008 at 5:07 pm
Amen, Amen, Amen. You said it perfectly. There are some things that are wonderful they way they are and should not change. And I agree with, Kristi, no white shoes after Labor Day!
September 15th, 2008 at 5:27 pm
I have not seen/owned a SL in several years, so when I saw one in the grocery store yesterday, I took the time to feel the paper and look at it up close. Your two posts are so right on concerning the changes, not just in SL, but the South in general.
I remember having a discussion with a group of people a year or two ago that were convinced in their heads that NC was no longer a Southern State because it didn’t feel southern to them anymore. I was taken aback and appalled.
September 15th, 2008 at 5:31 pm
I’m with you. Not all changes are good, nor are they even necessary. Change for the sake of change is a baulk against some mighty good traditions that are full of memories and warmth.
I know what you mean about living life in the South. I still miss it and would move back in a heartbeat, especially if I could have access to such wonderful hearts that live here.
September 15th, 2008 at 5:33 pm
Amen sister!
September 15th, 2008 at 5:39 pm
Amen…amen. It’s sad that we’re losing the old South little by little. Like you I don’t have nothing against new things in general, but I hate that the new things are replacing the old South.
I mean, what would happen if we went to New York City and started replacing the Deli’s with Cracker Barrels. All heck would break loose! People would die.
Yet, us genteel Southerners sit back newcomers change everything about the South. Maybe we’re our own worst enemies(?)
BTW…Charlotte is getting a IKEA soon.
September 15th, 2008 at 6:14 pm
I was so happy to read that another southern woman was as upset as I was over the new Southern Living Magazine. My husband kept saying “what’s the big deal”…men they just don’t understand. I was totally devastated as I have every issue since getting married 17 years ago. I will keep my subscription but I sure don’t have like it.
Love, Love, Love your blog!!
Beth
September 15th, 2008 at 6:15 pm
Amen. Simply amen!
September 15th, 2008 at 6:16 pm
This Southern Girl thanks you from the bottom of my sweet tea soaked heart for putting into words what I’ve always felt about the south. I love it and I also hate seeing the things that make us unique disappearing right before my eyes. I agree about Southern Living, I still have my subscription, though. For now, that is :)
September 15th, 2008 at 6:37 pm
People wear white year-round?!?
Sigh. I suppose it was bound to happen, especially given that I recently received a wedding invitation that not only had registry information included (TACKY, as my mama would say), but indicated a registry for the couple’s honeymoon as well (my mama just had a heart attack and died). Maybe Southern Living will respond to reader feedback – if this many of your blog readers are annoyed, then the fury across the South and its diaspora must be out of control.
September 15th, 2008 at 6:46 pm
My sister has received Southern Living magazine for the last twenty five years from her Mother-in-law for Christmas and this year she is going to tell her not to give it to her. It’s so sad. Thanks for addressing this.
September 15th, 2008 at 7:01 pm
Amen and amen, Boo! Well put and excellent post.
Please tell me that you will guard the sanctity of sweet tea along with me. There is nothing else like it….my vice and the best beverage on earth!
September 15th, 2008 at 7:19 pm
So sweet.
Just like good ol’ southern sweet tea.
: )
September 15th, 2008 at 7:20 pm
So well said. I, too, hate change. But, tomorrow Scarlett (Boo), is another day.
September 15th, 2008 at 7:22 pm
Maybe I missed it somewhere….but exactly what was the reasoning behind changing SL? Was it financial/downsizing or just to update/change??
My vote is to leave perfection alone! Why didn’t they do a survey first and ask all of us what we thought??
You know us…we would have TOLD them!!
Great post, Sophie!
September 15th, 2008 at 7:33 pm
It is hard to say goodbye to something beautiful and beloved. I’m not even Southern and I lament the homogenization of the South. Good post.
September 15th, 2008 at 7:35 pm
I found your blog through a link on Angie Smith’s blog and the first entry I read was the one on the changes to SL. You were able to put into words everything I was feeling when I saw the new format. For this Savannah girl (born and bred, married me a local boy and never left), I know what you mean about the South changing.
I remember Paula Deen before she was anybody. It’s been tough getting over the commercialism of her restaurant (it was soooo much fun BEFORE), but I guess I can find it in my big ole heart to give her magazine a try. At least it isn’t hard to find around here – you cain’t (misspelling intended :D) her big ole grin!
September 15th, 2008 at 7:37 pm
Sorry – that last sentence was SUPPOSED to be:
At least it isn’t hard to find around here – you cain’t (misspelling intended :D) miss her big ole grin!
**Where’s the edit button when you need one, and why did I forget to proofread? Sheesh.**
September 15th, 2008 at 7:38 pm
A~Men…. From a Mid-Westerner who LOVES the south…
September 15th, 2008 at 7:39 pm
Preach it SISTA!!!!!!
You are right on. Our little corner of Arkansas has become very “metropolitan” because so many people have moved in to be near Wal-Mart from Northern cities and while I enjoy the growth – I don’t enjoy NOT hearing southern accents or the fact that I don’t always feel like I’m in the south anymore. Scott refers to our town as “yankville”. It does make me sad.
September 15th, 2008 at 7:42 pm
Wow…soooo well put…I couldn’t agree more. I loved the old Southern Living so much that I have volumes of them stored in boxes…years of them, actually. My mother keeps hers too. However, I’ve tossed the “new” ones, and am seriously considering not renewing my subscription. It’s not the same. Period. Your post sums it up beautifully.
Sarah, TN
September 15th, 2008 at 7:47 pm
Hear, hear — very well said!
However…
I could never, ever cancel my subscription to Southern Living even though I agree with everything you’ve ever said about the new look! My grandmother would turn over in her grave and my mama would probably never speak to me again.
Thanks for putting into words what I’ve been thinkin’ myself :)
Julie, NOLA
September 15th, 2008 at 7:49 pm
You had me at Tennessee Williams…love your blog! Southern women unite!
September 15th, 2008 at 7:50 pm
Well said, Boo.
And how about Kristi talking about doing a hurkey. Takes me right back to 8th grade cheerleading.
September 15th, 2008 at 8:11 pm
Hear, hear!
September 15th, 2008 at 8:30 pm
I am a midwesterner who has been a long-time subscriber to SL. Love the food, love the weather, love the nice people, love the family emphasis. So I, too, was upset with the changes.
It’s not just the south that has become homogenized–people are moving around like crazy and never seem to settle anywhere. I think we all miss those times because they were simpler.
So perhaps we have to look forward rather that focusing on the past. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but it would be nice if SL would revert back as a nice reminder.
September 15th, 2008 at 8:41 pm
And the people said, “Amen.”
September 15th, 2008 at 8:44 pm
Just makes me want to support those local businesses and establishments even more!
Tomorrow, I think I’ll head over to Piggly Wiggly instead of Publix, and Dreamland BBQ instead of Ruby Tuesday’s for lunch!
I’m with you….let’s try to preserve some of our Southern Landmarks (and authors and artists and musicians, and publications). I want my kids to know as much about Katherine Tucker Windham and Harper Lee as I do….
Thanks for the reminder!
September 15th, 2008 at 8:54 pm
Bravo! Bravo! All your southern readers are applauding your post…
September 15th, 2008 at 8:55 pm
And the Southern women say “amen, honey child!” I salute you with a cold glass of sweet tea! Thanks for reminding me of things that ARE important that people DON’T get, like traditions that the younger generation, of which I am raising one, scoff at. My 21 year old daughter can NOT understand why I whine if she wears white shoes to church from now until Easter! I can’t explain it to her, I just know it ain’t fittin. If we’d all stuck to our guns like you are sticking to yours on this issue, we might not have a generation of girls who think jeans are meant to be worn below their hip bones, y’know?
September 15th, 2008 at 9:08 pm
Amen, Sister.
From Sandy, who’s missing Tennesse more than you can imagine.
September 15th, 2008 at 9:12 pm
Great post! Loved every word!
September 15th, 2008 at 9:12 pm
Amen.
Except white & linen are still not ok come September 2.
September 15th, 2008 at 9:14 pm
I agree.
There is nothing like the South.
I love it and get aggravated at it at the same time. Just like siblings feel- I can talk badly about it sometimes, but you (anyone not from the South) can’t!!
I love all things Southern except sweet tea. My sister says I can’t call myself a GRIT because of it.
AND I’m sorry, but I still can’t accept white any time of the year. It’s. just. wrong.