I Owe You At Least This Much

I’ll go ahead and tell you right now that this post is basically going to be one big long run-on sentence THE LIKES OF WHICH YOU’VE NEVER SEEN, because the husband and I have to leave in about one hour and seven minutes and I need to whip my house into shape so that our sweet babysitter doesn’t think that we live this way all the time, what with all our decorative Star Wars action figures strewn about the living room and the oh-so-stylish dishes from this morning’s grits stacked up in the kitchen sink, and the kicker is that I really don’t have a whole lot to say other than OH MY WORD, IT’S COLD, and sweet mercy in heaven this week has offered an abundance of television riches.

Somebody give the Lord a handclap of praise.

And oh wait. I do have one more thing to tell you.

I am in the midst of a deep-rooted hair crisis and I desperately need highlights but I CANNOT spend the money to get salon highlights even though I really, really want to be more blonde at this juncture, which brings me right back to my never-ending home hair color dilemma and I promise I’m going to quit talking about my hair color woes at some point in, well, my life, but it might not be until I’m 85 and I’ve surrendered to the gray, and the only reason I say that is because I cannot picture myself sitting in a stylist’s chair when I’m 85 and patiently waiting for her to wrap my hair in pieces of foil, though certainly I could be mistaken in that assumption because if I’ve learned anything in this life it’s that I’LL NEVER SAY NEVER WHEN BLONDE IS INVOLVED.

So anyway.

I have to clean now. But I’ll be back later (“later” being tonight or tomorrow or 2013) with an “Office” recap because OH, HALLELUJAH, we get a new episode tonight.

In conclusion comma I leave you with the lone picture I took at our Christmas dinner, and I’ve been meaning to share this with you for some time but it just seemed so random, only now I have the perfect excuse because this whole post is pretty much an organizational disaster and would no doubt make my English professors so proud.

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You’re welcome.

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Comments

  1. I love when you talk about your hair woes because it is a never ending point of concern with me as well. There may reach a point very shortly where I don’t need to spend the money I do EVERY FOUR WEEKS to keep up the blond – but I don’t know what to do yet. I’m considering trying the local beauty school? (not attending – just letting them do it?) And I always say when i reach 60 – I’m just letting the gray take over. But I really doubt I can ever do it.

  2. OH! WHAT A BEAUTIFUL PLATE!!!

    We have the same dish-design-taste, I’m sure of it!

    I hope that baysitter = DATE NIGHT!

    Love and prayers,
    Holly

  3. Do not give in to the home hair color temptation! This wisdom comes from little ol’ me who decided today that, sure, I can give myself “ginger twist” highlights on my medium to light brown hair from the comfort of my bathroom.

    Want to know how that worked out?

    Orange. Stripes.

    In the strong name of Jesus, just say no!

  4. I.LOVE.THE.OFFICE!!! Woohoo! Ok, my name is Mrs B and I’m addicted. I’m pretty sure I would lick the bottom of Jim’s shoe if I got the chance…ok, maybe not…but I definitley would chew his gum.

    Enough, enough. Does it count when the Star War’s toys all over the house belong to your husband. I actually had to threaten physical violence because he wanted to put his lightsaber on our fireplace mantle…”yeah, my husband is 12 years old”…

    Enjoy :)

  5. Being a good deal closer to the 85 year old age mark than you, dear Sophie, it is still a dilemma. I currently will not spend the material blessings we have on a beauty shop hair coloration – have had some bizarre health mugging and my hair fell out – now grows back in quite white and impossible to color! Sitting here with extremely pale reddish tint blondish white hair – I’ve done my own color for a gazillion years no problem – now – just sad. Very sad. Can we send in our pledges and you go see the Hair Weezard?

  6. Linda Sue,

    You’ll be happy to know that my sweet friend Leigh has offered to PULL MY HAIR THROUGH THE CAP so that I can get some good, all-over highlights. You can imagine my relief. :-)

  7. Wait, go back. Could you please share your cheesecake recipe? Pretty please? I am desperate for a recipe.

  8. Oh, the agony of hair. After 20 (yes, twenty) years, I finally went to a salon and got a cut and highlights and lowlights and I think somewhere in there I got a Waterford chandelier light, because the whole experience cost SO much that I nearly passed out at the checkout place. Check it out here:http://www.medalyn.com/ and you’ll get a glimpse into why it cost so much. Oh, the beauty of the medspa… oh, the agony of the Mastercard bill a month later. And there is NO WAY I could ever recreate what the hair artiste did.. no WAY. But it would be cheaper to buy a wardrobe of hats… very CHIC hats.. than to go back. I feel your pain.

  9. Sophie BooMama,

    It would delight me to NO END for you to live blog the pulling of the roots through the cap.

    I think it would make the internet a better place.

    That is all.

  10. I don’t think that I can give you a run-on sentence quite as good as yours but girl, if you think that it is cold down there you should be here in NE Ohio where at the current time of 7:05 PM EST, it is 7 whole entire degrees- in Farenheit! Whew. Schools were closed today because it was too blasted cold this morning. How cold? Um, -2 F. It is supposed to be colder tomorrow. So, at 35 my brown hair may be highlighted with gray and I may not be in a highlight crisis (I say step away from the at-home highlight box, B-Mama, step away from the box), but I do believe that I am the current winner of the cold temperature. Unless you would like it.

    Ha. I have to win at something! Beats my haz-mating my house since my friend fell ill with the “yucky stomach flu” while she was here. I’ve bleached, Lysol’d so much that I had to run out in the blessed 7 degree weather for more and have wiped down ever surface that I think that she touched. I’m not a germaphobe at all. Nosiree.

    But y’all have a nice night, you hear? :)

  11. Oh, I am with you on the hair color dilemna. After 40+ years of being a blonde and paying mightily to stay that way, I am now returning to my more natural, light brown color. It is an exercise in humility as those pesky gray hairs just pop against the darker background.
    Let’s start us a support group…something like “Blonde Ladies Only Now Dark due to Economy.” We could go by the acronym of BLONDE but our hair would no longer be. sniff * cry
    Have a good evening out!

  12. All I can say is: YUM!

    Also: I want cheesecake now, THANK YOU!

  13. It’s like Pacman!

  14. Now I am craving cheesecake something fierce. Thanks so much.

  15. You. Crack. Me. Up. All the time, pretty much without fail. I, being a brunette, do not understand, personally, the blonde thing, but I do understand the hair color thing. I am going gray and I am naturally a very, VERY dark brown – almost black hair color. And, my hair is stick straight and very fine, but thick. The gray ones are coming in very coarse and CURLY. Yep, curly. They poke me in the eye. What do you do with that?

    As for Star Wars toys, I don’t get it. My son is all grown up now so I only have to deal with the little girls’ video games. And CDs. And books. And hair things. And guitars. And microphones. And little things, whatever they are.

    Good luck with your hair. I hope you have an awesome friend that might do it for you, free of charge. As for that darned cold weather (that doesn’t seem to help the hair, by the way) good luck. God is in charge of that!

  16. There is a LOT about this post that I could comment on, but all I’m going to say is DANG! I WANT SOME CHEESECAKE!

  17. Girl, you make a run-on look so good.

    Happy cavorting and then Office-ing!

    -Andrea

  18. So, run on sentences are ok? I personally love run on sentences and think I will use them more often in my writing.

    And the hair thing, I am dark brown with a no cut cut and in desperate need of a hairstyle and highlights but I must agree with the others, step away from the box. Don’t look back.

    Also, so funny the girl who wrote about her husband(age 12) being the one with the light saber toy, my husband is nine, I’m sure of it. My daughter says her’s is six, ouch. Love your stories, so funny.

  19. I love the run-on.

    I can commiserate with your hair woes. I’m just trying to find a free day when I can actually get my done, because one time (well, many times!) I dyed my hair canary yellow and I just cannot make myself try on my own again. Ever. And I’m pretty sure my roots could rival anyone’s at this point!

    Yay, new Office!!

  20. Saw my hair wizard today and I just wonder how much longer I’ll keep doing this (spending this) with her. Before my wizard….I was a HUGE fan of the home product. I’ll hook you up! Coming to ATL? See you at the homewood suites and we’ll knock it out! :)

    Hugs,
    Fran

  21. My favorite blog post of yours ever! (Well, along with some other ones with Martha and your mom and the fish camp, etc.)

    Have a great weekend.

  22. Oh honey. You sweet, sweet thing you. Today I ran off to my hair mistress and dropped the big bucks (for out here in the stix anyway) more because I needed to get out of my house than I needed color. But. Let. Me. Tell. You. When I left, it was -20. Straight up. weather.com gives that a “feels like” -45, what with the wind and all. And that was at noon. After they canceled school for “extreme temperatures.” Since when I woke up, it was nearly -40. I put my girls in snowpants, just for the 1 mile drive to Grandma’s. And I wore long underwear. Just to get my hair done.

  23. I have had many, many…..many failed home hair kits. Just walk away…haha.

  24. Oooh…CHEESECAKE! Recipe, please. And Thank You.

    Also, it’s a balmy 19F here right now, headed down to about 8. Degrees. It’s colder than a brass doorknob in my little part of the world.

  25. Girl. GIRL! I broke down and paid the salon piper Wednesday, and I hated to give up the money on something like highlights, but it was either that or, you know, keep looking like Two-tone-Tilly. I’d been putting it off for a month, but I finally told my husband that I HAD to have my roots done and after he took a good look he told me to “Go with God.”

    Loved the run-on post. You’re a hoot.

  26. 9 sentences later … :)

    (yes. I counted them.)

  27. LOVE THE PLATE.

    ahem. anyway.

    My dear friend right here in my own neighborhood just shared the same deep-rooted hair dilema with me TODAY about not passing a mirror without gasping audibly and not wanting to spend the ninety dollars at the hair salon to get it done professionally so she begged ME to go to Walmart with her and pick out the right color and please would I try wrapping her hair myself this weekend sometime and pray it turns out okay. Oh and by the way she said, “I process quickly”. I’ve never highlighted my own hair before… what does processing quickly mean and does all of this really mean I should be running for the hills about now in order to preserve our friendship?

    Oh how I want some of that pie on that pretty plate. That sure would help right about now…

  28. You do know that I’m the QUEEN of home hair color, don’t you? Why have we not gotten together? My teen was with me yesterday when I got 2 compliments on my hair. He’s right here – I’ll let him tell you: OK, in 13 yo style, he’s refusing to talk.
    I’m totally a Loreal Coleur experte kinda gal so let me know.

  29. 1. School was cancelled for tomorrow here in Lexington, Kentucky because it is TOO COLD TO GO TO SCHOOL. This is a first.

    2. Try coloring your own hair. I started a few months ago and am AMAZED at how easy it is and how great it looks. Seriously. Try it. If it’s totally screwed up your hairdresser can fix it. And if not? You have saved a buttload of money.

  30. Wow, you are unbelievably cute and my goodness can I understand the chaos of Starwars decor and grooming woes, and anyway, anyone who is a mother will understand every facet of a run-on sentence because not only do we write in them much of the time, we also talk in them, think in them, scold our children in them and clearly, we blog in them :)

  31. OOH! That just really makes me want some cheesecake.

  32. I think you should try a real pretty auburn.
    And that was a big slice of cheesecake.
    And I prayed for you today.

  33. I’m a good girl most of the time, but I can get downright drunk on cheesecake. I gotta watch myself. That one looks FINE. It looks like the one I had at the Depot in Springfield, TN way back when. Have you posted a recipe for that thing? I’m going hunting.

  34. Alabama and cold are not ever used correctly in the same sentence unless in conjunction with ‘not’,’never’, or ‘what’s that?’

    The HIGH here today sister was………get ready for it……… MINUS 12. Yes dear one, that’s 12 degrees BELOW the zero mark. Add to that the windchill (it should be called wind FREEZE by the way) of roughly -30 or so, and filling up the gas tank ranks right up there in my least favorite things to do outside.

    Currently, it’s a ‘balmy’ -26 outside, but that blasted windfreeze thingy is makin’ it feel a bit nippy at -50.

    My wonderful hubby, just 3 weeks home from the desert (where 50 degrees is freezing) is currently working OUTSIDE, at night, on the flight line, in this winter wonderland. Can you say BBBUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!! He can; once he comes in, warms up, takes off the first 8 layers of clothing, and hugs the furnace for 30 minutes or so.

    Thank the Lord my thermostat goes right on up there to some Alabama winter weather of 68 or so. I’m right comfy now.

    Oh yeah. It’s time for that bottle of blonde to be hittin’ my head again too. Not afraid of the home system though as my daughter’s got talent. Now if she could just figure out a way to make me look 50 pounds lighter and 10 years younger, I’d be doin’ fine.

  35. Southern Gal says:

    I picture you talking just like this all the time anyway. My mama talks 90 miles a minute, always has. We just hang on and pick up every other word and we’re good.

    Hair color. My poor mama was a hairdresser back in the day and she colors my hair with home color kits. I have LONG, CURLY hair and I only buy one kit. She is so good and doesn’t say a word as she tries to stretch that stuff as best as she can. She does pull a bit and I’m wondering if that’s cause she’s mad and doesn’t want to say anything.

    I want to go back through all this and take out all my punctuation and just keep going….

  36. I just LOVE it when you post like this!!

    And being an alabama girl myself…my blood is too thin for this weather. Its stinkin alabama….the unbearable summers are supposed to be the tradeoff for managable winters…

    Global warming my hiney!!

  37. Loreal 2 Step Colour (that’s how the box has it spelled). Oh my word, easy. 2 steps, never was there a more clever product name.

    Oh…”learn your rules”.

    Good luck to you.

  38. Please stay away from home highlights. General coloring is ok but highlighting, I think is too much for us laypeople.

    A friend of mine just tried highlighting at home and her hair turned Clemson orange – seriously! Then she had to spend money on a professional to correct it…and the professional told her she couldn’t guarantee that her hair wouldn’t fall out!

    Resist the devil and he will flee from you!

  39. So I have been reading your blog for awhile and never commented. I really wanted to when you posted a little story about that Clairol root touch-up product that you were frightened to use. But now I feel I must step in and enlighten you!! It is the most amazing little hair color invention EVER. I have used it with my salon highlights and when I got brave and did the ol’ box color at home. It is pure magic. MATCHES ANYTHING! I also feel the need to tell you that I have discovered the best kept secret in hair coloring care. I started getting my hair highlighted, lowlighted, etc at the local beauty school. yes, you may say, how brave of you. But if you request a more “senior” girl, they do a most rockin’ job. AND it only costs a FRACTION of what I was paying at the salon. SO then you can afford to be as blonde and heavenly as you ever desired. Just wanted to share :) I love you blog BTW and I started watching The Office because of you. You should also totally watch The Big Bang Theory-it’s quite hilarious.

  40. Boomama, you are special. :)

  41. I, too, am in the middle of a deep rooted hair crisis, but I think I’ve finally found someone to do my hair (6 months after my old hair stylist fired all her clients so she could–well, stop doing hair). So, I wish good things for your hair, and my hair both. May we be blonde forever.

  42. Thanks for writing about your hair. Makes my day. Praying for Kelly and her baby.

  43. My favorite posts that you write are the ones where you are rambling from one place to another. You are real and lovable and completely down-to-earth. That’s what makes me love to be one of your minions for the past few years. (Quit squirming and accept the compliment! That’s another reason that I so like you – you don’t let it go to your head.)

  44. I just love that you can talk about a whole lot of nothing and get 43 comments and make me smile the whole way through! :-)

    And now I must find myself a cheesecake.