ASCAP Christian Music Awards – Part Two

So remember yesterday how I told you that last year at the ASCAP Awards I was really, big-time, super chicken about meeting Louie Giglio and when I finally talked to him it was like I turned into a spastic cannon and I couldn’t make the words stop shooting out of my mouth?

Remember that?

Well, yesterday when I walked in to the place where they were having the awards, Sister’s co-worker Dan (he is ASCAP’s Christian music guy, and he is also hilarious) said that he thought it might be fun for me to sit at a table with some of the guests instead of sitting in the back of the room and hiding behind a computer. I told him NO, NO, BEHIND THE COMPUTER IS FINE, THANK YOU, and he said, “Well, the point of this whole night is fun, and I want you to have fun!”

Dan had apparently forgotten that my usual brand of fun is a bucket of chicken from Popeye’s (all white, extra spicy), a 12-pack of ice-cold diet Coke and an all-day marathon of “The Real Housewives of New York City.”

Anyway, Dan went on to say that the whole dinner thing would be an absolute blast and oh, by the way, I was going to be sitting at a table with, among other people, Shelley and Louie Giglio.

And then the room was suddenly filled with so much irony that it flipped over and started to spin and everything went black and I fainted.

Now. Before I go even one step further with this little tale, I want to be clear that I really don’t put people on pedestals (except I probably do put Amy’s hair on a pedestal. And Christy Nockels’. I think it’s because THEIR HAIR BELONGS THERE). My issue at pretty much any large social gathering is that I stink at small talk, and I haaaaaaaaaate situations where people might feel like they’re forced to talk to me. You compound the forced conversation with the fact I’m at an awards dinner and at some point in the evening I’ve got to explain to the other people what in the sam hill I’m doing there since I don’t sing or write music or, you know, work in the music industry, and that means that I have to tell them that I have a blog, and inevitably people ask what I blog about, and usually the best answer I can think of is, “Um. I don’t know. Bacon? Cheese? The Bachelor? My hair?”

It all just reeks of awkward.

So.

After Dan told me about The Table I went downstairs to change clothes and tried to figure out how I was going to make small talk and Twitter and take pictures and blog and whathaveyou while trying to be a polite dinner companion. The more I thought about it the more nervous I got and I am not even kidding when I tell you that I got so worked up that I started digging through my bag to see if I could find anything remotely resembling a nerve pill because MAMA WAS FEELING A LITTLE ANXIOUS.

When I walked back upstairs I looked at my phone and saw that I’d missed a call from our friend Travis, so I called him back and told him that I was dealing with a tricky situation because Dan had put me at a table with Louie Giglio and Some Other People and I was a nervous wreck and had gotten myself completely worked up and what, what should I do, WHAT?

Travis told me that MAYBE I SHOULD PRAY (point well taken) and then: “Oh, it’ll be fine.”

“But you know how I ramble when I’m nervous. I’m terrified of an awkward silence and I just talk and talk and talk and talk to fill up all the empty conversational spaces.”

“Well, that’s true,” he said. “You’d better watch it or you’ll just talk and talk and then it might get quiet and then before you know it you’ll start saying LAMININ LAMININ LAMININ LAMININ LAMININ and you won’t be able to stop.”

“EXACTLY.”

“Just please don’t say ‘laminin‘ over and over.”

“I won’t. I WON’T.”

LAMININ LAMININ LAMININ LAMININ.”

As it turned out, I was totally safe dinner-wise, because Sister, Dan and I decided that it really might come across as rude if I was sitting at a table and pretty much typing or texting the entire time. So instead I stood in a doorway to the side of the stage, and it was delightful because in addition to being able to take pictures and run back and forth to the computer, I was able to look at Amy Grant’s hair almost the entire time.

I know I’ve mentioned it before, but her hair is spectacular.

The awards really were a ton of fun – I love being in settings like that where people are super-supportive and appreciative of each other – and I even got to talk to a couple of sweet bloggy friends who were there, too (hey, Liz! hey, Amy!). I had the best time.

Once everything was over I started gathering up all my stuff, and I was just about to leave when I noticed Sister talking to someone who was holding a bunch of awards. And when I moved a little closer, I realized she was talking to none other than Louie Giglio. So I did what you would absolutely expect me to do: I took their picture.

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After the picture we said our goodbyes, and y’all, as Louie was walking away something came over me and it was like I couldn’t help myself and my mouth opened up and this is what shot out of it:

“LAMININ!”

And in that moment I felt like a complete goober, but I also felt like I’d had a bit of a victory because I didn’t say the word over and over – I only said it one time. Just once!

But do you know what’s even better? After I said it, Louie Giglio turned around, grinned and fired right back:

“LAMININ!”

And that is the story of how the laminin made my whole night.

Well, the laminin and, you know, Amy’s hair.

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Comments

  1. You crack me up. I hope you took a picture of Amy’s hair and I hope you will share it with us sometime. :)

  2. Boo…

    I hardly ever comment here because you have so many every day but today I had to tell you…I just love you. I don’t know you face to face, but I love you. (In a sisterly way though…not the scary stalker way)

    I suppose I should clarify that comment by saying I love to read your blog. You make me laugh and I appreciate your candor. And all the bacon and cheese and hair. And THE NATURE…let’s not forget that.

    So…thanks. I’m shutting up now. (See? You aren’t the only one who spews mindless word vomit…I do it too, only I’m worse because I haven’t even MET YOU)

  3. You are such a joy – a honest to goodness, real fried chicken loving, Jesus friend joy – thanks. I needed a smile so what did I do? Clicked over here for some LAMININ wid you!

  4. As a new reader, I’m not sure, but is the Laminin thing a location joke or something. Or am I just dumb and don’t get it? Thanks for keeping us up to speed on all the goings on in Nashville…

  5. Click on the link where “Laminin” is in green – it’s a powerful
    message that’ll keep the word “laminin” on your mind for a few days. :-)

  6. Okay- so you didn’t talk to Amy? She does have herself some fabulous hair. I was so hoping there would be a great Amy Grant story today! Hope you had a good time.

  7. Oh my gosh, that is so funny!! I am so glad you had such a great time!

  8. New to your site (I’m catching up from the beginning) and just think you’re the best! I’m a Mississippi girl who moved to Alabama, too. :)

    Love the Laminin story! Louie is amazing and that story always reminds me of how amazing our Creator is.

    Thanks for being such a light!

  9. You simply crack me up! I love reading your blog and all your down right silliness. I probably would have said “laminin” to Louie too…just so ya know your not alone!

  10. How could you NOT say laminin to LG? Love him!

  11. HIE-stinkin-LARIOUS! As soon as you said “Louie Giglio” I thought “laminin, laminin, laminin”! You were totally right to say it, no matter what that Travis says! Oh my word.

  12. After watching that video, I would have to say that laminin made my whole life. Thanks, Boo Mama. I’ve never seen that, and today, I needed to. I s’pose everybody needs to, actually. Keep having fun! Bless you…

  13. I went off and watched the Laminin video before I saw your comment. That’s just wild. I know I’m a geek, but sometimes I really love science.

  14. Lindsey says:

    In a few hours, I have to make a speech in front of a UF’s student senate while I try to convince them not to cut some departments I desperately to keep. Tomorrow I have to speak to UF’s Vice President of Student Affairs about the same thing. Not to mention the fact that I know nothing about how budget cuts work, really.

    I am freaking out, slightly.

    THANK YOU for reminding me that I need to pray!

  15. It kind of reminds me of the time in a Peanut’s Christmas show, where Sally was supposed to say “Hark” and practised and practised and then said “Hockey Sticks.”

    At least you didn’t say “Hockey Sticks” or “Laminin, Laminin, Laminin….”

  16. Oh, that was so hilarious!!! My kids are gathered around wanting to know why I’m laughing so hard.

    Laminin Rocks!

  17. I know you told me this story this morning, but I just had to tell you that this post pretty much sums up all the reasons I love you.

  18. …and the pictures of Amy Grant’s hair???
    Great post, Boo. Treat yourself to some of that bacon flavored Chapstick I saw on TV and you’ll be just fine.

  19. Thank you for sharing the fun and for passing along Laminin. How beautiful is that!!

  20. You are so fun!

  21. WOW! That’s I’ll I can say after watching that video. All those years of schooling about the human body and I’ve NEVER even heard of Laminin! Awesome.

  22. What Big Mama said.

    (Except for the part about hearing it this morning. But I imagine it was only enhanced in that format.)

  23. Laughing…

    As for the earlier post, I would have thought it was a biscuit, too. ;>)

  24. I LOVE it! You made me laugh when I was feeling a little down! Thank you for being such a blessing! Laminin! :)

  25. Love how God brings things together…the pastor @ my church spoke on the passage from Colossians 1 that Louie Giglio refers to in this video on Sunday–thanks for the link!

  26. You are so funny and your post made me laugh. Then I watched the laminin video again. I’d seen it several times before (even own the DVD). Still, it made me cry. Again. You may not have felt it, but you certainly were HELD TOGETHER that entire night – your post is evidence of that!
    And I too want to see pics of Amy’s hair.

  27. Reformed Grits says:

    Ok, I can say that laminin made me totally cry and praise God in my kitchen this morning. Thanks for bringing it up.

  28. You are hysterical! Love you, girl…oh and I totally love Amy Grant’s hair…can’t wait to see the picture!

  29. That’s EXACTLY what I would have said! I love laminin. I love Louie. I love this story!

  30. don’t you think every other person probably says laminin a time or twelve to him? and i bet he does not mind that at all. ’cause after all, that laminin is something to talk about